Sunday, June 04, 2006

its been long time i havent airing my thoughts... well most likely thoughts that are lonely...coz i feel lonely of missing my famly back home but then i feel helpless coz i cant go home till i get my goal or as I have planned, and hey this is just part of the challenge of choosing this path. For i know God has never left me nor forsake me, and its me who always athink this way and feel this way, i cant detach myself to the thought that time is such precious to me... i dont want to say to myself one day that I shouldnt have done these or i should have done that. I should chose this instead of deciding...it feels difficult when you are in doubt of your decision...but then before i close my eyes i just say I know there is a God up there who knows my every thoughts that no one can interpret no matter how they watch, look and observe me, no matter how much i open my mouth to details.

Pinapatulan ko kasi emotions ko, elln namn... emotions lang yan, sbi nga gamitin ang utak, thats why theres also wisdom, dont self destruct, dont poison urself to something unpleasant. (kausap ko lang sarili ko mga pre) pinagagalitan ko lang. ma-pride pa kc ako pa minsan lalo na pag wala nakaka halukay ube ng thoughts and feelings ko, namimiss ko na bessy ko. I hope she's ok.

Again, father God sorry for complaining, u know naman I always mention to you how much i admire u and praise u for u are wonderful to me. U always hear me whisper I love you.

3 Comments:

At 11:52 PM , Blogger Ayie Marcos said...

When I received the message to my email saying u have a new post, though I am in the middle of very important "something" (bisnez of course), I immediately opened your blog n' read.

I know this is where I am able to know what u hav inside at this moment.

I've been so open with u from the first day. And again I will frankly tell you that I "know what is running inside that L-U-K-A brains and Stupefied heart of yours" , I know everything. But I don't have the guts to ask you...i cant.

I can't imagine both of us crying, hugging each other on the bed. Wow, bka kung ano ang mangyari. Bka nga gapangin mo na ako! ahahha

Kidding aside, thanks that this post clarify the thoughts I have in mind. Sad to say, I don't like hearing you complaining, kahit kelan hindi mo rin maririnig sa akin ang ganon. Why? coz as you've rightly said, "pinili natin to". And God, as a loving and understanding as always, knows where we are heading to. Kailangan lang natin i make sure that we always ask for His guidance.

Elle, I am a mother, sensitively I can feel the emotions flowing from you. Sabi ko nga sayo diba, panganay kita. Bunso Si Pao. But as a mother I have to be tough, courageous, a fighter. Wla akong kapartner at this moment. Hindi ako pwedeng maging mushy and soft.

I hope u understand what I mean. Basta alam na lang natin ang mga nangyayari sa nakatalukbong na kumot, iisa lang ang ginagawa natin, ang lumuha.

Mag iiyak ka na, mag iiyak din ako, pero por santo, ampanget pag nag duet tayo!

Kaya chill, kahit walang pera, maglibot libot. Pag para akong may menopause, iwas ka lang. Alam mo na yon, kulang na naman ako sa kalabit *wink*!

Sige na nga, I love you too. Kahit praning ka to the max. I care for you.

Loves,

Ma Ays.

Ps. Ito na ata ang pinakamahabang comment ever! Wagi!

 
At 4:10 AM , Blogger Mmy-Lei said...

comment ba yun, parang post na kasi... ika rin kasing LUKA-LUKA!!!

 
At 7:59 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cool blog, interesting information... Keep it UP » »

 

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